Week 3 Game Thoughts: Broncos at Dolphins

The Dolphins played their first home game of the season today, and they added a special menu item for the fans: a Seventy Burger! The Dolphins steamrolled the Broncos to the tune of 70-20, setting a franchise record for points in a game and falling just two points behind the all-time record (and they could have set it with a late FG if they chose to).

I’m sorry, I need to rewind for a second. That was NOT a typo: the Dolphins actually did score 70 points today, all on offense.

I’ve never seen anything like this. You’ve heard of the Greatest Show on Turf? Well, right now, this Dolphins’ offense is better. Kevin Harlan said it best at the end: this was a game that almost defied description.

This game was really over before it began, with the Phins jumping out to a commanding 35-13 halftime lead. The halftime stats were better than most team’s full-game stats:
• Phins’ offense gained 344 yards, including 138 on the ground, at 9.8 yards per play
• Tyreek Hill had 122 receiving yards and 1 TD
• Raheem Mostert had 105 all-purpose yards and 2 total TDs
• Rookie De’Von Achane had 78 all-purpose yards and 2 total TDs
• Tua completed all 16 of his passes, for 206 yards and 2 TDs

And if you think that’s good, the final numbers enter the realm of absurdity:
• Phins’ offense gained 726 yards (still not a typo), including 350 on the ground (nope, not a typo either), at 10.2 (!!!!) yards per play
• Tyreek Hill had 157 receiving yards and 1 TD
• Raheem Mostert had 142 all-purpose yards and 4 total TDs
• Rookie De’Von Achane had 233 all-purpose yards (203 on the ground) and 4 total TDs
• Tua completed all 23 of 26 passes (that’s 88.5%, in case you are wondering), for 309 yards and 4 TDs, and an almost-perfect QB rating.

Even Mike F’n White got into to the act, with a 68-yard bomb to Robbie Chosen for a garbage-time TD.

This is the first time in NFL history that a team has had both 5 passing TDs and 5 rushing TDs.

I am literally at a loss for words – and you know that is rare for me. This is uncharted territory. The numbers I listed above are all but impossible – but Mike McDaniel and his team made the impossible possible today.

What do I even say? I guess just a few notes will suffice, and then the celebration is on!

Terron Armstead started at LT today. Kendall Lamm was very good the first two weeks, but the difference between Armstead and Lamm is much bigger than I expected. Armstead is just great. The OL was outstanding today.

The defense played today too! Javon Hollland had two forced fumbles, both recovered by Miami. Emmanuel Ogbah had his best game of the season with multiple pressures, a sack and a near-INT.

Tua channeled his inner Mahomes today, with an eye-popping no-look shovel pass to Achane for a TD.

I can’t say enough about Mostert and especially Achane. Broken tackles, speed and power…just amazing. And even Chris Brooks joined in, with a 52 yard run.

Connor Williams had two costly holding penalties that wiped out two big plays. He left the game in the second half with a groin injury, replaced by Liam Eichenberg – who had about 5 high snaps by my count. I guess there had to be something negative.

Rookie TE Julian Hill got tons of snaps today, and was an absolute monster as a run blocker.

Braxton Berrios just makes plays.

Tyreek Hill is a godsend…best trade in Dolphins history?? (I’m sure 316 and Hal will let us know…)

That Tua dude, he’s pretty good.

I don’t know…what else can I say? The Dolphins are currently the only undefeated team in the AFC, and there is no question that they have the best offense in the NFL. Next week is the BIG test: a trip to Buffalo. Can the Dolphins start off 4-0 in the conference?



Hero of the Game: Tua, Tyreek, Mostert and Achane could all share this award. But I’m giving it to Mike McDaniel. His game-planning and playcalling is just insane. This guy is playing that weird tri-dimensional chess game that you see on Star Trek, while opposing defenses are still trying to rub two sticks together to discover fire. I can’t even describe it. “Genius” isn’t a strong enough word to describe the Dolphins coach.

Goat of the Game: Nah, son. Not going here today. We won 70-20.

Now I know how DolFans felt in '77 after the Thanksgiving day massacre of the Cards. And also how they felt in '72 when the Pats were mauled, mashed and mutilated 52-0. I honestly thought I was hallucinating when I first saw that the score was 63-20...and then they added ANOTHER TD?!?!

As for best trade in Fins history if Hill's not at the top I have no idea who is!!! Only one even in the same universe IMO is the trade for Paul Warfield.

Bills schmills, I'll be spending all week watching as many highlights of this one as I possibly can

We scored 10 offensive TDs today. Just can't stop thinking about that.

JMP wrote:We scored 10 offensive TDs today.  Just can't stop thinking about that.

Sean Payton may seriously resign, I wouldn't blame him if he did. SOMEBODY on the team will lose his job on the plane ride back, maybe multiple somebodies. A team doesn't and can't lose that badly without repercussions. I might feel bad for him if it wasn't for that whole bounty thing.

Remember the reports that OL Butch Barry practically got run out of town in Denver and Broncos' players celebrated when he got fired?

Yeah, neither do I. This Dolphins OL is playing out of their minds.

DolFan 316 wrote:

JMP wrote:We scored 10 offensive TDs today.  Just can't stop thinking about that.

Sean Payton may seriously resign, I wouldn't blame him if he did. SOMEBODY on the team will lose his job on the plane ride back, maybe multiple somebodies. A team doesn't and can't lose that badly without repercussions. I might feel bad for him if it wasn't for that whole bounty thing.

He should be fired for keeping the entire starting offense - including Russ Wilson - in the game right till the last play. That should be a fireable offense, letting his starting QB get his ass kicked play after play in a game that was over in the first quarter.

Karma's a bitch. All that crap he talked about the former Broncos' coaching staff just bit him in the ass. He's a piece of human garbage..so glad he was on the receiving end of today's historic ass-kicking.

JMP wrote:Karma's a bitch.  All that crap he talked about the former Broncos' coaching staff just bit him in the ass.  He's a piece of human garbage..so glad he was on the receiving end of today's historic ass-kicking.

I TOTALLY FORGOT ALL ABOUT THAT!!! Okay, now I've decided to root for him to resign in shame and never coach again

But seriously, Payton will no doubt throw Vance Joseph under the bus and maybe a couple other coaches and players too. He totally seems to be that type. Hope Broncos fan are happy now, be careful what you wish for! I could've told them that no coach has ever won a Super Bowl with two different teams, and Payton damn sure won't be the first!

The Chiefs are trying to steal our thunder!  Up 31-0 over Bears at the end of the half.

When the Bears get the #1 pick, do they move on from Fields?  

JMP wrote:The Chiefs are trying to steal our thunder!  Up 31-0 over Bears at the end of the half.

When the Bears get the #1 pick, do they move on from Fields?  

I am openly rooting for the Chiefs to fall short, and they'd have to run it up on purpose to catch or pass the Fins.

And yeah, if it wasn't obvious drafting an Ohio St. QB is an all-time bad idea BEFORE it sure is now! Imagine passing up a QB at #1 because "We've got Justin Fields". Their GM doesn't deserve to have a job in the NFL ever again after this!

A sobering thought for the rest of the NFL: we just put up 10 TDs...and Jaylen Waddle didn't play.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Wow. I was wrong, I felt this game would be a struggle.

Very glad to be wrong though.

Remembering that Thanksgiving ass-kicking in 1977, good times. Griese threw 6 TD passes. People forget that the Cardinals were serious challengers to the Cowboys in the NFC East at that time. 11-3 in '75 (Cowboys got to the SB as a wild card, Cards won the East), 10-4 in '76, and 7-3 going into that Thanksgiving Game. And it all collapsed after that game; they were winless the rest of the season, Coryell was fired, and the Cards went into a string of losing seasons that lasted well into the 1980's.

JMP wrote:A sobering thought for the rest of the NFL: we just put up 10 TDs...and Jaylen Waddle didn't play.

Be afraid.  Be very afraid.

I hope the Bills have a good laundry service, they'll be changing their pants 2-3 times every day once they start watching the tape!

HalCHorn wrote:Wow.  I was wrong, I felt this game would be a struggle.  

Very glad to be wrong though.

Remembering that Thanksgiving ass-kicking in 1977, good times.  Griese threw 6 TD passes.  People forget that the Cardinals were serious challengers to the Cowboys in the NFC East at that time.  11-3 in '75 (Cowboys got to the SB as a wild card, Cards won the East), 10-4 in '76, and 7-3 going into that Thanksgiving Game.  And it all collapsed after that game; they were winless the rest of the season, Coryell was fired, and the Cards went into a string of losing seasons that lasted well into the 1980's.

The hilarious part is that the Cards were favored by 6 even with both teams having the same record going in, and the media at the time was bashing and trashing the Fins for "not having any stars".

Also, Conrad Dobler tried to start his usual bullying shit and got what he deserved for once

Gonna have to send some meth or coke or something to the Bills' defensive coaching staff this week...no time for sleep when they prepare for the Dolphins' juggernaut offense!

JMP wrote:Gonna have to send some meth or coke or something to the Bills' defensive coaching staff this week...no time for sleep when they prepare for the Dolphins' juggernaut offense!

Now they've got to worry about Achane and Brooks, and Waddle should be back barring any NFL shananigans.

THIS is why I kept talking about wanting more offensive versatility.

JMP wrote:

Travis Wingfield
@WingfieldNFL

Tua Tagovailoa's stats through three games:

72/101
1,024 yards
8 TDs
2 INT
121.9 passer rating

6:07 PM · Sep 24, 2023

But remember, Tua's no better than Mac Jones! A Pats media guy said it so it MUST be true, right?

Waiting for the media this week to yammer on about how Tua actually sucks and is the most overrated player in NFL history

DolFan 316 wrote:

JMP wrote:Gonna have to send some meth or coke or something to the Bills' defensive coaching staff this week...no time for sleep when they prepare for the Dolphins' juggernaut offense!

Now they've got to worry about Achane and Brooks, and Waddle should be back barring any NFL shananigans.

THIS is what I kept talking about wanting more offensive versatility.

Absolutely. Last season it was the Hill and Waddle show. Now it's the Hill, Waddle, Berrios, Mostert, Achane, Smythe, Cracraft show. With a QB playing at a ridiculously high level and a playcaller that is working at an almost inhuman level.

BTW - the top 5 fastest recorded runs in the NFL this season are all Dolphins. Speed kills.

This is all sorts of awesome.

Today is when I learned that even Twitter (or X or whatever the hell it's called now) actually CAN be useful

Here it is - the Dolphins conga!

A picture says a thousand words:

Tua is a killer of giants:

CBS Sports wrote:Tagovailoa has won 10 straight games vs Super Bowl-winning head coaches, now the longest such streak in NFL history.